The following items just in from Baltimore, Maryland and other points around the globe:

Two days ago a gay Christian Republican architect and his straight-but-queer-identified Methodist Democrat cat attempted to pick up an unnamed Slanted correspondent at the Baltimore-Washington International airport.

A few months or years ago, the Skee-Ball lanes that resided at the front of the arcade in the Dover Mall in Dover, Delaware were moved to the back of said arcade. No word yet on where the Air Hockey table was moved.

A long time ago or more recently, people began painting idyllic landscape scenes on miniature hand-saws. (Incidentally, these saws make excellent gifts for co-workers.)

In perpetuity: Nothing induces self-loathing like writing a book proposal--except maybe taking two years to write it.

In other monsterific, maelstrom-like and terrifying news:

GRUDGE REPORT

Less of these things is usually better than more:
mayonnaise
lies
dijonaise
evasion

More of these things is usually better than less:
catsup
truths
cocktail sauce
directness

And lastly, lazily ...

THE QUOTE OF THE DAY:
"It seems I was busy doing something close 2 nothing, but different than the day before...."